Riddikulus HP Answers

[FAOLAN DELA CRUZ]

I have seen this on a few other sites, and am interested to see what this group can come up with. The game is quite self-explanatory; just choose a ridiculously wrong answer.


EXAMPLE #1:
Q: What creature did Harry have to fight off in the Chamber of Secrets?
A: A large pink stuffed teddy bear!

EXAMPLE #2:
Q: What are the four Hogwarts houses?
A: Ipswitch, Tankadora, Siriusego, and Whatsamatteryou


So, I will start.

Q: What exactly is Dumbledore's whole name, again?

[Deleted]

A Why, everyone knows that. Albania Pottermore Wolfie Brando Dumbledore, of course.

Q  For advanced students only, now.  What is the statistical likelihood of AK-ing yourself, and if you do, can you be prosecuted for it?

[FAOLAN DELA CRUZ]

A. For advanced students it's only 97%, only first years get as low as 63%. And yes, under the charge "Willful Coloring between the dimensions."

XD

Q. How many houses are there in the school?

[Deleted]

A: Why, 42 of course.

Q: What are the magical properties of boomslang skin?

[FAOLAN DELA CRUZ]

A. It protects you from people with no common sense.

Q. How did Harry find out how to kill the Dark Lord?

[Deleted]

A:  <<Having studied Harry's final examination from aurors' training>>  Dumb luck.

Q:  Is there any truth to the rumor that Voldemort's name literally translates to flight of death or flight of doom in French?

[FAOLAN DELA CRUZ]

A. Actually no, it translates to the phrase 'a pickle makes a squishy bookmark.'

Q. How many kids can get in the Potions cupboard at once?

[Deleted]

A:  That depends on whether Snape is teaching the class or not.


Q:  Who the hell would tickle a sleeping dragon anyway?

[MUKHTAR KEL GRES]

A. It's a profession, the Proud Dragon Ticklers of Spinner's End. They are famous for their spinning tickles actually, something similar to a whirling dervish where one spins close under the dragon's nose and they are so distracted it's easy for them to get an epic tickling under way with rakes. They have to use rakes as the dragon's scales are thick enough they would never feel a human's fingers.

Q. How many witches does it take to screw in a lightbulb?